literature

The All-Alex Rejects Chapter 10

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The Rejects walked down the tunnel for what seemed like hours but may have only been minutes. In the dark, Alex Jr. held closely to Morgana. Morgana felt strangely comfortable in the dark, as did Mars. Paeton was a bit nervous, and Alice was her usual self. The tunnel was also rather narrow, almost to the point where they needed to be single file at points.

“Who could’ve built this?” Mars asked, “And why would it be connected to where the imaginary friends live?”

“Well,” Alice said, “Mr. Wilt said that it is a tunnel that goes to a city of comic book characters. Perhaps Alex constructed it as a way to allow Wilt, Robix, and Zelda to get there quickly.”

“Well, it’s certainly taking a long time to get there,” Mars replied. He looked back at the nervous Alex Jr. “How’s it going back there, Junior?” Alex Jr. let out a nervous whine. “Don’t worry; it shouldn’t take much longer.”

Soon enough, the Rejects saw a thin, vertical crack of light. “What is that?” Paeton asked.

“Light!” Alex Jr. proclaimed. He let go of Morgana’s arm and rushed over to the light. Under his feet, he felt the stairs Robix had informed them of under his feet. He pushed his hands against what was allowing the light inside. He opened two doors and was flooded with bright white light. He embraced it. Then the lights dimmed. “Hey, hey, HEY!” he yelled, “What gives?” He opened his eyes and looked ahead. His friends stopped behind his outstretched arms.

The Rejects found themselves in a museum. The tunnel led them to a secret entrance/exit in the museum’s floor. An elderly man walked over to them. “Hey, you kids,” he said, “The museum’s closed. You need to-“ He saw the flashlight in Alice’s hand. “Oh, I see you’re the night guards. They’re letting such young kids work here now. Well, good luck, kids.” He turned out the light, leaving only fading sunlight and dim background lighting to keep the room visible.

“Wait, what?”

They looked around at the exhibit they were standing in. The cases displayed reports of a woman from the Middle Ages who could apparently control her shadow and used it as a weapon. They even had the dress she used as her outfit. The exhibit was titled “The First Superhero.”

“What does this mean?” Mars asked. Before they could find an answer, the wall next to them was destroyed by a large green hand. “Oh my God!” They started running away from it, but another hand intervened. It grabbed them and pulled them out of the museum, destroying the entire wall and part of the ceiling as it did so. The Rejects struggled to get out of the hand.

The hand brought them close to the face of whatever was holding them. It was a giant humanoid plant monster. It stared at them and prepared to eat them. Just then, a huge glob of yellow, gooey matter hit the monster’s eye. It covered its eye in pain, lowering the Rejects closer to the ground.

“Hey, I’ve got an idea,” Mars said. He took out his sword and cut the monster’s hand. It was like slicing a vine with a machete. The monster roared in agony at this and the Rejects began plummeting in the hand, which was opening. “Brace for impact!” he yelled. They landed on the ground, cushioned by the softness of the hand.

“What the heck is going on?” Paeton asked, “Where are we?”

A man in a ridiculous set of teal tights, wearing a white mask and a goofy hat, flew down next to them. “You kids shouldn’t be out here,” he said, “Tonight’s a really dangerous night.”

“What is that thing?” Paeton asked.

“That is Growzer. He’s a giant plant monster, created by a mad botanist. He possessed my girlfriend and used her to create a physical form for himself.” Growzer roared. “You stay here; I need to defeat him on my own.”

“No,” Mars interjected, “We’re helping you. You saw how I took off its hand with my sword. I can help you.”

“I can take this guy on alone. I’m faster than the time it takes to microwave nachos, stronger than a bag of chips, and able to fly without spilling any cheese.” He flew up to the monster’s face, but was swatted away like an insect. He landed on a nearby rooftop and was not seen getting up again.

“Oh, no!” Mars said. He got up and charged at Growzer. He stabbed his sword into the beast’s foot. It yelled out.

A woman wearing a black catsuit flew down on a hoverboard. “Thanks,” she said, “Keep doing that and he’ll be too distracted to attack us.” She flew up and flew around Growzer’s face to annoy it. She flew back over by Mars. “Don’t stop attacking him! We need to keep him busy so he won’t cause anymore collateral damage!”

“Right,” he complied. He resumed slashing at the plant beast. Soon, he was joined by a bald guy wearing black tights riding a skateboard.

“Not bad,” the skater said, “You’ve got the right idea. Let’s put this plant…through the shredder!” He began spinning his skateboard so fast, it was able to cut through Growzer’s ‘flesh’. With their combined teamwork, Mars and the skateboarder took out Growzer’s foot.

A blonde teenager with green skin swung in on her long tongue. “Did I miss the party?” she asked. She looked up at the monster, still trying to get the woman on the hoverboard away from him. “I see there’s still some more work to be done. She threw her tongue at the severed ankle and wrapped her tongue around it. Giving it a tug, Growzer was rotated and started to fall, grabbing onto the sides of the buildings as he did so to keep himself from falling all the way.

“Holy!” Alex Jr. yelled. His hands started glowing with a light purple aura. He looked at them. “Alright!” He started to throw magical blasts at Growzer, which caused parts of Growzer to get burned off.

Another group of superheroes came along on top of a roof. A wheelchair-bound man yelled, “X-Press Mailmen, attack!” All the rest jumped from the rooftop. A man with letter-openers in his knuckles landed on an arm and started slashing through it. A beastly creature landed on the torso and began tearing off sections of leaves and vines. A Jamaican man distracted Growzer with rain. And a young man flew over Growzer and froze his hands in place with telekinetic abilities. With the combined efforts of so many, Growzer collapsed on the street. The teal-wearing superhero stood up from the rooftop and flew down, picking up Mars. They flew over to Growzer’s chest. He let Mars go, and Mars plunged his sword into the beast’s chest, killing it. Its life-force gone, the plant monster began to wither away into a brown and brittle pile of plants.

The teal-wearing superhero, the hoverboard woman, and the telekinetic man landed around the monster. The other superheroes looked what they did with their combined effort. It was truly awe-inspiring. They began congratulating each other.

The skateboarder looked at Mars, getting down off the chest. “Hey,” he said to Mars, “We couldn’t have done it without your help. Thanks.” He shook Mars’ hand. Mars noticed that her hand only had three fingers. “I don’t believe we’ve ever met before. I’m Roger, but most people call me, ‘The Black Skateboarder Dude Guy.’ It’s because I wear a black suit.”

“Pleased to meet you,” Mars said, “I’m Mars and these are my friends, Alex Jr., Morgana, Alice, and Paeton.”

“Hello,” BSDG replied.

The hoverboard woman hovered over. “Are we introducing ourselves?” She made a jumping motion, and her hoverboard folded itself inside her shoes. “I’m Nancy.” She shook Mars’ hand, and she also had three fingers.

The girl was next. “I’m Lizard Girl. My father’s a great scientist. He’s the reason why I became a superhero.”

The wheelchair-bound man spoke next. “I am Professor Chaz Express. The pleasure of meeting is mine. These are my X-Press Mailmen, Letter-opener-ine, Beast, Anti-Weather Man, and Mailing Boy. I sensed distress coming from this part of the city and so I sent them out with priority shipping.”

A superhero came running down the street. “Cosmetics Man is here!” he yelled. He stopped when he saw that the monster was felled. “Aww, darn it! I missed another opportunity to be a hero.” He walked away sadly.

“That was Cosmetics Man. His superpowers come from beauty products. He’s not very good as a superhero.”

Finally, the teal-wearing superhero introduced himself. “And I am Nacho Man. I’m faster than the time it takes to microwave nachos, stronger than-”

“Yes, Nacho Man,” Professor Express said, “You already said that to him.” He turned back to Mars. “So what brings you here?” he asked the prince.

“We met these imaginary friends and they told us to come here.”

“Ah, yes, the Wilter and Compuxter, no doubt. Those two were good heroes.”

“Hey,” Paeton asked, “Where exactly are we?”

“I’m sorry no one told you, Ms. Toadstool. I can tell you’ve been wondering that for quite some time. This is Ryestone, Colorado. Though considered the superhero capital of the world, it’s relatively unheard of. We also have the only geyser in this area of America.”

“So there’s an entire city inside Alex’s mind?”

“What do you mean, young lady?”

“You guys, and all of this,” referring to the city, “are the creations of Alex and all this takes place inside his mind.”

“I’m afraid I don’t understand.”

“We’re rejected characters that Alex created and then never made official, so now we’re trying to find a way to become official characters.”

“Well, I’m still not quite sure what you mean, but I know you’re welcome to stay here. Ryestone is a very peaceful town, save for the occasional attack from super villains. The folks around here are usually very friendly.”

“Well, that’s reassuring,” Alex Jr. said.

Lizard Girl walked over to him. “That was some pretty cool fighting you did there. How did you do that?”

“I don’t know,” he replied, “I just said ‘Holy!’ and my fists became purple. By the way, that was pretty cool what you did with your tongue.”

“It comes from being half-lizard.” She smiled at him. “It’s completely natural. Wanna feel my skin?” She stuck out her arm for him to feel.

Alex Jr. stroked her arm. It was very scaly. “Whoa,” he said, “That feels strange. Yet for some reason, I like it.”

“Mr. Junior,” Professor Express said, “Please rejoin your colleagues over here, if you don’t mind.”

“I’ll talk to you later, Lizard Girl,” Alex Jr. said to her.

“See you later!” she replied. He ran off and she threw her long tongue around a flagpole and swung off.

“Now, Rejects,” the professor continued, “Since you don’t seem to have parents to report home to, I can arrange for you to spend the night at our mansion, Express Academy for Future Mailmen.”

“Well, thank you for the hospitality,” Mars said.

“My pleasure. Speaking of which, would any of you like some Chick-fil-A?”

“What is ‘Chick-fil-A’?” Alice asked.

“It’s an American fast food restaurant chain headquartered in the Atlanta suburb of College Park, Georgia, specializing in chicken sandwiches.”

“I dunno,” Alex Jr. said, “I’m still kinda full from all those cookies.”

“Then perhaps we’ll stop at Dairy Queen and get a delicious Blizzard for you to wash those cookies down with.”

“What? I’m not sure what you’re talking about.”

Alice looked over at a nearby building, which had a large sign that said ‘Dairy Queen’ on it. “I think I understand what is going on here,” Alice interjected, “Professor, what do you like to drink?”

“I always love the delicious 23 flavors of Dr. Pepper.” Nearby, there was a bus advertisement for a soda called ‘Dr. Pepper.’

“I knew it,” Alice said, “It is blatant product placement. Alex’s love for real world products is very strong and his favorites are in the worlds of his creation. But since we have never heard of them before as Alex never characterized us enough to make us familiar with them, we’re completely unaware as to what they are.”

“If we weren’t characterized to know these products, why do you know what product placement is?” Morgana asked. Alice shrugged in response.

“If there is nothing else of any importance here,” the professor continued, “let us return to the academy.” He whistled. A large mail truck pulled up. The X-Press Mailmen all boarded and the Rejects followed.


At the academy, the professor led the Rejects to a room for the five of them. “You can stay here for tonight. Tomorrow, I’ll check to see if we can find you somewhere else to live.” The Rejects entered and looked around. The room had a few beds, a washroom, and a balcony. “Make yourselves at home.” He shut the door.

Alex Junior immediately got onto one of the beds. “God, my back hurts so much.” He laid down and put his head on a pillow. He sighed, “Ah…that’s much better.” He kicked off his shoes.

Paeton went over to a bed and got on it as well, though she was facing down on it as not to crush her wings. “These beds feel pretty comfortable.” She wrapped her arms around her pillow and pressed her face into it and sighed contently.

Mars got onto a bed and Morgana did, too. Next to Morgana’s bed, Alice spotted an outlet and plugged herself in. She then sat on the bed next to Morgana.

After sitting in awkward silence for a few minutes, Alice was the one who broke it. “I do not like it here,” she admitted.

“Why not?” Mars asked, “The hospitality is great and the beds are comfortable. Or is it some kind of robot thing that you’re having trouble with?”

“I’m not a robot! What I mean is that I do not feel comfortable in this city. It seems far too dangerous, with super-powered people who fight giant monsters on a seemingly regular basis. I do not want to live in a place where my life is constantly in danger. That would be incredibly stressful.”

There was a knock on the door. It was opened. Behind the door was the mailman named ‘Beast.’ Speaking in a very formal manner, Beast said, “I whole-heartedly apologize for interrupting any conversation, but I had a desire to present you with some beverages as an act of my own hospitality.” He held out a tray with five cups. Each of them had a fizzy red liquid inside. “I made some cherry Kool-Aid Fizz, made by mixing Kool-Aid with club soda.” He walked to each Reject and handed them a cup, each being met with a form of ‘Thank You.’ Just as he was leaving, he noticed the balcony had its curtains drawn shut. “Goodness me,” he replied, “the young night is too beautiful to be ignored.” He walked over in an animalistic manner and threw open the curtains, revealing a starry night sky with a beautiful full moon. In the distance, the city skyline could be seen all lit up. “That’s better.” He went back out into the hallway. “Bedtime’s at 10:00. Bonne nuit.” He shut the door.

Alice took a sip of her beverage and resumed her rant. “And the blatant product placement is annoying, too. I do not care to hear constant name-dropping of certain sodas or restaurants or other things Alex enjoys.”

“But,” Mars pointed out, “what if Alex does product placement with his other characters? I know these characters can’t be recent creations of Alex’s. I mean, we all have five fingers while they only have 3. Also we have necks. But who’s to say that from these three-fingered people to his current characters, Alex has not stopped product placement? What then?”

“I don’t mind it,” Alex Jr. said, “If that Dr. Pepper stuff is any bit as good as this Kool-Aid drink, I could totally live here!” He finished off his Kool-Aid and set the cup on the floor. “It’s so good to sleep on a bed.” He covered himself in the sheets and soon, he was snoring.

“This day feels like it’s gone by so fast,” Mars commented. He put his belt with his sheath attached onto the table between his bed and Alex Jr.’s bed. “We rode on that truck, walked around for awhile in the open…then we met those imaginary friends and we went through that tunnel. And after defeating a giant plant monster, it’s now time to go to sleep. Wow.” He yawned. “Such an eventful day and yet…it feels…so…short…” The prince also started snoring. The lights went out.

“Well,” Paeton said, “Since it’s time to go to sleep, might as well. She covered herself with the sheets and hugged her pillow again. “Night, Morgana.” She closed her eyes and her wings went down, wrapping her shoulders and body.

With all the other Rejects (besides Alice) asleep, Morgana followed suit. She put her flower on the table between Paeton’s bed and her own, got under the covers and said, “Good night, Alice.”

“Good night, Morgana,” Alice replied. Morgana seemed to have trouble getting to sleep. She seemed uncomfortable. Alice helped her out by gently rubbing her hand along Morgana’s arm, like stroking a kitty. Morgana seemed to be calmed down by this. Alice started thinking about Mars’ comment. “It does seem strange. Unless our previous sleep went into the late hours of the morning and we spent multiple hours in the tunnel as well as at the meeting place of the imaginary friends, this day could not have lasted more than about 5 or 6 hours. Even the intervening time between sunset and 10:00 p.m. seemed too rushed. It’s as if time moves at a much faster pace in this place…Wonder what that could mean…”

In the middle of the night, the Rejects were all woken up by a sudden bright light coming from outside. Alice, being the only one whose eyes weren’t sensitive to bright light, stared out the window at whatever could be making the light.

Alex Jr. sleepily rubbed his eyes open. “Is it morning already?” He yawned. “I’ll take a cup of coffee with a lot of cookie-flavored creamer.” He got out of bed and put his shoes on. Suddenly, the door to the balcony burst open. Wind gushed in loudly. “Whoa! I don’t need that coffee anymore!”

The other Rejects got up and started walking outside to figure out what was going on. Mars put his belt back on, Morgana grabbed her flower, and Alice unplugged herself. They all went out onto the balcony. It was still clearly nighttime outside since the sky was black and starry. “What’s the meaning of this?” Paeton yelled over the whirring of the bright thing in front of them.

The lights backed up and turned to the right of the Rejects. They saw that the lights were the headlights of a small spacecraft, constructed out of a large refrigerator. It moved closer to them and tilted, allowing for easy entrance. In the pilot’s seat was an old man with a grey comb over, a grey handlebar mustache, and a grey pointy beard. He wore a brown jacket, yellow shirt, and brown pants.

“Who are you?” Paeton asked.

“I’m the Architect,” he said. He stuck out his hand. “Come with me if you want to live.”
Wow. Ten chapters already? What a spectacular milestone!

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